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Thursday, April 25, 2013

Blood, Sweat, and Tears

So I have just come out of a relationship and went on a pickup binge. I got more than 20 phone numbers and did tons of hours in field. I also started feeling mixed emotions which consisted of hopelessness and determination all wrapped up together.

What I learned is that failure teaches you what works. If you are lucky, you will learn what works at the beginning. But usually, you learn all the things that don't work first then suddenly, a light bulb goes off and you realize what you should be doing.

Yes, I am pretty ragged right now but I have had so many numbers flake recently that I finally hit the stupid lightbulb that showed me that, "DUH", I need to stop putting band aids on bad approaches and expect girls to text me back or answer my calls after a shallow pickup.

Also, trying to text game or phone game a girl that you didn't connect with on the initial approach is pretty damn hard. If you have a great approach and interaction then you have some wiggle room to fall down from and make mistakes in your texting and phone calls.

I also realized that I always blame myself and think that there is something wrong with me when a girl doesn't answer. I couldn't be further from the truth. Women only respond to someone that they really connected with  in a way that in beneficial to them or interests them somehow.

Anyway, rambling is over. Talk to you guys soon,

BlueHaze

Friday, April 19, 2013

How to be Fun and Confident

I usually post original material but this video set off a light switch for me. Even though it may not seem so serious, this kid really hits the nail on the head when it comes to confidence, fun, and arrogance in a conversation with women. I used his same attitude when picking up girls tonight and ended up with 6 phone numbers and multiple dances. Check it out and see how he interacts with the girls in his video.


Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Plateaus, Luck, and Probablity

So you might be wondering what these three things have in common.

Well, they all fit together during times of what I call, "the desert". The desert is a time when you might feel like giving up when results just aren't coming in. I've felt like this at various times during my journey to become better with women.

So let's start off with plateaus.

Plateaus are times in your development when you feel like your progress is at a halt or has significantly slown down. In my own experience, plateaus are short for me because I will absorb information from others and from written material very fast then figure out a way to make my progress jump again.

On the other hand, I have met some people that will stay at a plateau for weeks or even months. They will hit their plateau and then just give up, become a keyboard jockey, or continue the same behaviors and expect for their results to change.

One of the main things I have seen people do is repeat the same actions and expect new results. In order to get better results you have to calibrate what you are doing and modify it to be more effective. This take trial and error, watching others, and studying at home.

So what about Luck?

This is something I have experienced many times while learning game. There have been many times when I have met a wingman that has taught me something so important. And it has happened by luck. There have been times when I felt like giving up and I met someone that taught me something new that catalyzed me to new heights after being in a deep pit. For example, I was thinking about leaving the community altogether recently until I met a wingman that showed me some daygame techniques. That catalyzed me to do a 7 day approach challenge with myself and I learned how to effectively approach women during the daytime.

You never know when you will be propelled forward by someone or learn something from reading that will increase your results dramatically. The main thing is to just keep looking and meeting people. From time to time, you will get these rare gems of knowledge. However, if you only half-ass your time in the community, you may never get to these lucky rare gems.

Lastly is probability

Increasing or decreasing your probability is a factor in your success in pickup. Sitting at your computer all day or sticking to one group of pickup guys will most-likely decrease your probability of success in becoming better with women.

You can increase your probability of success by:

1. Meeting lots of wingmen
2. Approaching a lot
3. Trying many types of game
4. Reading from different sources
5. Having more interaction with women

There are many more ways to increase your probability of success. But, if you just spend your time doing one thing, for example, just reading material all the time or just doing one type of pickup, then your probability for success will dramatically go down.

Let's bring these three things we discussed together...

Throughout your journey, you will be faced with plateaus. In order to overcome these plateaus, you must raise your probability of success by doing actions. Overall, on your journey, if you overcome plateaus and increase probability, you will eventually uncover hidden gems by luck (unpredictable when you will find these) that will propel you forward by a big margin.

The main thing is to be efficient and hard working along with being consistent and very determined. If you do this all the time (months or even years), you will become great with women. It is a very unpredictable course in the short run, but realize that in the long run it all leads to success to those that or organized and work hard.

Sunday, April 14, 2013

How to Achieve Success with Women

Most of the challenges we face with becoming good with women are limiting beliefs and mental blocks. There have been many times where I have realized that my state of mind was the only thing that blocked me from doing what I wanted. Limiting beliefs also set up a fence around what you can and can't do.

Without dealing with your limiting beliefs and mental blocks, learning pick-up or seduction will be dysfunctional or limited results will be achieved. If you really want to excel and put yourself ahead of everyone, fix these things first.

Limiting Beliefs

Here are three types of limiting beliefs:

1. What you believe you can or can't do

Here is a personal example of this from my experience. For example, there was a time where I made out with a very hot blonde at a bar. Previous to that, I felt that it wasn't something that I could do. Another example is my first time approaching a really attractive girl during the day and creating attraction. Until then, I didn't feel that I could do that.

After experiencing these two scenarios, my beliefs in what I could do expanded. Also, after these experiences, I realized that I should always believe that I can do anything. It's better to give yourself the artificial confidence and belief rather than wait until you get the experience. Always realize that you deserve the hottest and highest value girls out there.

2. What you believe is possible

Many times, we don't have things like same night lays or instant make outs in our realm of reality. Usually, it takes reading, a video, or actually seeing someone do it to realize that it is possible and bring that possibility into your reality. There is so much you can do with women that you may not realize. Always strive and have faith that anything is possible. Guys who think this way usually have experiences and "get away" with stuff that most other guys never even try.

3. What you believe women to be

There are so many myths out there about women. One myth is that they aren't into sex as much as men are. That is definitely a myth because women have more elaborate fantasies and can have stronger sex drives than men.

I recommend looking up "limiting beliefs" or "myths". I have read a lot of material on this from various pick-up artists. I remember when I first started, I read belief myths and they blew my mind. Realizing that women liked to be approached and that they really like sex was a revelation to me. It opened my realm of possibilities up where I was able to do a lot more with my skills.


Another self-defeating mechanism that we have is the idea of mental blocks.

What are mental blocks?

Mental blocks are fears, anxiety, self-programming, and much more. Many guys sabotage themselves before they even begin saying a word to a woman. Examples of this would be saying, "She probably has a boyfriend", or, "She probably won't talk to me or will blow me off". Moreover, guys will have irrational fears that they don't know where they come from.

Approach anxiety. Fear. Avoidance. Worry.

All of these are emotions that reflect insecurities about ourselves. We may have approach anxiety because we think we are not good enough for the girl. Or past experiences of embarrassment have conditioned us to be fearful of approaching. We may be avoidant in other areas of our lives and it reflects in our avoidance of interaction with women. Also, worrying about whether she will respond to your text or call reflects past rejections or possibly scarcity of women in your life.

There are many ways to convert all these negative emotions and mental blocks into positives in your life and allow you a clear mental pathway to becoming good with women.

What you can do:

1. Understand that you deserve the woman in front of you
2. Understand that you have nothing to lose by approaching a woman
3. Understand that trying is better than doing nothing
4. Realizing that not all women will want you. So it is normal to get blown out of a set.
5. Face all of your feelings and analyze the root of each one. (understanding fear is what dissolves them).

The main idea of everything in this article is that limiting beliefs and mental blocks are the bottleneck that limits our success with women. Even if you read every pick-up pdf, article, and video on the internet, if you don't have your limiting beliefs and  mental blocks in order, there will be no mastery of your craft.

Spend some time with yourself and thinking about why you feel certain ways and fix them. It is a continual process and new feelings always come up. If you can do this, they your success with women will skyrocket.